There it is, Take it

Hello. I'm back. I think I'm back for good. We'll see. It's been an interesting time in which I haven't felt like I had much interesting to say. But I'm back. And think I may have things to say in the not so distant future. 

In the meantime, here is some Los Angeles-- (by AM Bushe) a city I love more than I ever expected to-- and a place that's welcomed me in its own weird way like not too much else before. I hope you're having a great Monday and that your holiday weekend was as fantastic as mine. And that you weren't one of the 490 DUIs in LA this weekend... woof. 

There It Is, Take It... from A.M. Bushe on Vimeo.

Pete & Suz's Wedding Weekend Links!

All my NY friends are in town for Pete and Suzie's wedding. So exciting showing them lots of my favorite things about LA and enjoying the sunshine. Here are your links!

- Have you seen Pete's awesome photography website? He's amazing. 
- Spanish pronunciations of LA neighborhoods are making a comeback?
- This is why I didn't stay in NYC when I came back to the US.
- Also, Patti Smith says NYC has closed its doors to artists. Kinda agree. 
- The medium model for writers. All about living medium.
- These kinds of articles never get old to me.

- Finally, Alexander Skarsgard. You're welcome.

Landon's Broadway Debut Links

What are you guys all doing this fair fall weekend? McC and I are headed down to San Diego for a shotgun trip and some cooler weather. It's still pretty hot up in LA. Also hoping to meet up with my brother on the way considering, we literally pass his house on PCH on the way and neither one of us has a car at the moment. (We aren't related by blood, but we're clearly related. Sigh.)

I feel like I'm finally back in the land of the living with this phone now. I've already caught up with four people I haven't talked to in ages just by virtue of being on their grid again. The network of people I've collected and invested in on my travels is the greatest resource and source of joy in my life. Plug me back into that. 

- Today is one of those most loyal, supportive people's Broadway Debut! DOONER LOVE!
- I don't see a lot of movies in theaters, but this is a funny app. 
- Oh, the old creativity and mental illness talk again. 
- A kid who comes to school in a different historical costume each day? My soul mate! My hero!
- Blogstar. 
- A mom I super respect shared her story of choosing not to medicate her kids. People listen up. 
- This is disgusting, Mittens. You make me sick. 
- SO. IS. THIS.
- I've been waiting a long time for someone to make this Claire Danes cut mix. 
- This is still DEEPLY upsetting to me. If you're not caught up on Downton, spoilers ahead. 
- The Rice Centennial spectacle was indeed nothing short of a spectacle. Watch here.
- Or, if you only have 100 seconds:

Americana, Man

One week ago, my dad and his surrogate (my surrogate) family, in addition to some culture-shocked Scots, were rocking out to Steamboat Springs at the Myrtle Beach Depot. There was free New South Beer (Red Ale = delicious) and Red Velvet cake and brisket and pretty much everything amazing. 

Dad rocked out in all ways, as usual, but most especially, Statesboro Blues. And I got a little teary, as I always do, when they played Music Man in honor of Jeff. His son Hunter is practically a man now, and I hope a few more of these concerts and we'll have that college fund of his taken care of. 

My family's never quite been the same since my Grandfather died. It's hard to know what to rally around. But these gatherings somehow always clear up the confusion for me. I am enormously grateful for them. And for all the effort of so many people to make it happen. 

I'm not sure that my Scottish friends really appreciated what was going on. Perhaps its kind of an inside joke. But for some just off the boat Scots (And one who's reluctantly heading back) I can guarantee they witnessed some some m-f-in' Americana, Man. 

For Alyson & Dion, On Their Wedding

It was my great honor, this past Sunday, to stand under the chuppah with my best friends and say a few words-- some mine, some Don Paterson's-- about their great love and our shared experiences together over the last seven years. The two of them remain constant sources of inspiration to me to stay patient, to enjoy it all, and that loyalty to those you love really is its own reward. Here's what I said. It was a really beautiful day and I'm so grateful I could be a part of it. More from the wedding to come. 

For Aly & Dion

August 5, 2012

I spend a lot of time thinking about geography. So I'd like to say a little bit today about finding your way.  

There's a kind of emotional geography to these readings-- what you'll write and what you'll say-- in that, the spot on the map you're aiming for is the sentiment that is equally true of the bride and groom's relationship as it is of your personal feelings about them. That's why I'd like to start in New York City and end in Scotland, both old and new. 

New York is the kind of place where serendipity doesn't hide. It's right around every corner, on every subway platform, in every artistic partnership formed at a bar, in every answered craigslist ad. This is how we all came to be together today. Even though New York is on a grid system, it can still be remarkably easy to feel lost on occasion. It's the kind of place that serves as a proving ground that we are capable of making our way in the world alone....

But also that it is easier... and sweeter... when we go together. The way any number of people can see off the light of a single candle... and how that candle loses nothing by lighting others from its flame.  This is the best way I can think of describe both Aly and Dion. What they represent to me, to each of us here, and to each other. 

I'd like to quote my friend, the great Scottish poet (and rockstar!) Don Paterson: "And the true path was as lost to me as ever, when you cut in front and lit it as you ran. See how the true gift never leaves the giver; returned and redelivered."

For me (especially for me) and for each other, you have served as beacons-- lighting the path in front with your glowing, inimitable 'Aly&Dion-ness,' providing unparalleled comfort & relief, and signaling the way home. Which perhaps has never been a spot on the map at all-- never here nor there-- but which has always been together. 

In Transit Friday Links

When you read this, I'll be on my way to Halifax, Nova Scotia, having spent about 12 hours in NYC. It's been a four countries in a week kind thing. But I have a super fabulous reason for this excursion-- and it isn't just for the beautiful scenery and the fact that Nova Scotia is New Scotland. 


It's Aly & Dion's Wedding Weekend Extravaganza! I'm so excited to celebrate this day that's been so long in the making with so many of my absolute favorite people. Aly & Dion are basically an institution. They've always been together as long as I've known them and they're part of that bedrock group that is still the foundation of my life in New York. 


I'm also super honored that they've asked me to write something and give a reading. So I'm back to that. Want to get it just right, of course. I have a reputation of wedding speeches to maintain afterall. 


So here are your links:


- Funny article about writing. I can never read too many of these.
- I've been hard at work these days on my TV pilot. Let's just say, it has echoes of Three's Company.
- I could never read enough about Jeff Buckley.
- This Jonah Lehrer thing is depressing. 
- This "Things you might read on a fashion blog" is hilarious. 
- Kim Kierkegaardashian is genius. The philosophy of Søren Kierkegaard mashed with the tweets and observations of Kim Kardashian.

- Ultra, delux, cast signed copy of Gone with the Wind book sells for $135,000. Boom. 

Monday Music - Summer Mixes from my Brother

London's weather is nothing short of a miracle at the moment. For that, I send up a hallelujah. When the sun comes out, I simply must have a buffet of music to celebrate it. Luckily, this summer is full of great music. I'm not just talking about Milo Greene, Frank Ocean and Passion Pit, etc etc etc... I could really just go on and on... I'm also talking about the mixes my bro has been posting on his soundcloud page. 


It's wild and heartwarming to discover how respected my brother is in his industry. I'm feeling pretty proud. And I am counting down the days until I get to see him in action. The last time I saw him, he looked like this. Although, I think it's safe to say we both still look scarily similar to how we looked when we were ten, his real life face twenty years later is gonna look pretty good to me. In the meantime, I'll enjoy his skills via the internet and share them with you. I hope wherever you are, you're feeling that Summer feeling-- that it's sunny and filled with music. 

Perfectly Aligned

One of the most effective literary devices is the employment of twins. Doubles. Twelfth Night. I Know This Much Is True.  If you read any of my writing, you'll find an overwhelming presence of doubles, sidekicks and twins. I've always been drawn towards twins. A match to yourself. A set of aligned humans. My mom was a twin. I'm sort of genetically in line to have them myself. And, for a very formative time during my childhood, I had a kind of twin myself. 


This confuses people. Technically, my parents had no other biological children with any of their many previous or subsequent partners. But both of them accumulated some step children along the way. Sometimes these people wanted me, sometimes these people did not. I've got stories for days about these people who were and then suddenly were not my family. But there is only one that ever took a punch for me. That I had a kind of strange psychic connection to-- probably because I don't really remember any part of my life before he had come into it. 


From the time I was about four until ten, I was raised alongside a brother who I can pretty much only describe as my step-twin. My mom was sort of insistent about raising us that way. She was always trying a little too hard with it. Probably because of the contentious way she and Dax's dad had gotten together. That's his name: Dax. 


She made us do everything together. Sometimes we resented it, but mostly, it was okay because we had started out as neighbors and friends anyhow. We were born only about a month apart, looked alike, and while our personalities were sort of yin and yang, we'd lock ourselves in tiny spaces and cackle with laughter for hours. We ran wild together. We terrorized the many many neighborhoods we occupied all over Northern California. We hid from my mom together. We used to ride in the trunk of my mom's car... I think by choice. WHAT?


Sometimes, you guys, when I recount, even to myself, the reality of the details of my childhood, I myself do not even believe it. I do not know how I made it out. I do not know what kind of planet I lived on then. Except that for most of the worst of it, (and the best, too) there was this boy who fought with me and for me and hugged me and stuck up for me and intentionally took my mom's focus and anger away from me and onto himself. For many years, he both literally and figuratively stepped in front of flying fists aimed at me. And when the soft part of the back of my head got slammed into the corner of the coffee table, he was there too, trying to help me. There is no way for me to repay him for this. 


He got out sooner than I did. And when he was gone, suddenly, I had the courage to leave too. 


The family I always talk about seeking-- it starts with him. And for twenty years, I've had no way of contacting him. I searched and searched for years, on every social media and google resource available to me short of hiring a private investigator. A part of me wondered if he would even want to hear from me. Perhaps, it would open something he didn't care to revisit. But then finally, recently, he appeared. 


Just having pinpointed him. Knowing he is there. And where there is. To know he is doing well.  To hear myself addressed as sister. And receive the pledge of a brother. "Whatever you need, sis." It's brought a lot of things to the surface. 


I know that the bulk of the raw material of my life and life's-work was created during those years. That is the clay I am shaping and reshaping-- standing back to look  at, evaluate-- going back in to work at again. You get your hands dirty every time. It is the work I will never stop doing. It is the crux of the balance between the heavy that I came from and the lightness I am always trying to laugh my way towards. To make the heavy go light. That's really something. 


It gets easier. It gets harder. It gets more worth it. The really serious heavy lifting we all do to come to terms with the trauma we experience-- it is made worth it by knowing we did not go through it alone, that we helped each other by taking turns carrying the heavy, and that somewhere out there, if you just keep googling, you will find that twin again. 

Long Walks and Rice Reunions

Basically, I think I only like living in London when I can walk wherever I'm going. In the case of last night, that was The Albion near Barnsbury to meet up with an old time Rice friend, Laura Sawyer. Laura is probably the ONLY friend I have that overlapped into both of my primary activities at Rice: musicals and bartending at the pub. Bless her. I've always said that Rice friends remind you of who you really are. Which of course is a seething-with-neuroses, yet good-hearted nerd. 


Lots of beautiful patio space and hanging flowers at The Albion. Not great beer selection, but the Bloody Marys looked good. The chips were divine. As was the company. 


I even walked home. And, even though I was cold, on the first day of Summer, I started to remember why I wanted to move here. 


It's also the first day of the London 2012 Festival. I've been perusing my program booklet and starring all the things I want to try to catch. Perhaps the Stonehenge Bounce House? Summer in the City-- if it is indeed Summer-- is a favorite thing of mine. Here's hoping these festival activities are worth writing home about. And by that, I mean, of course, writing home to you, my dear lovely readers, wherever you are. 

A Weekend in the Country

Many thanks to the birthday girl, Susie, for being born so we could celebrate at the lovely Dripwell House in Northamptonshire! About 20 of us headed North or South (depending) for "camping," dining, and reels. We had delicious meals, a 1982 vintage port (1982 clearly being the world's most superior year) got a little rowdy during the reels and got no sleep. Just the way a weekend in the country should be! 

As per usual, I was thrown all over the dance floor and have the arm bruises to prove it. But despite the sore joints and lack of sleep, good friends and a good long walk (with lambs!) can make everything better. Kudos to Susie and fam for the awesome time. Non-kudos to the British rail system who routed and re-routed us about 4 times through Rugby, etc etc and made a 1:15 trip back to London last four hours. At least we got to nap! Hope you're all having a great start to your week!

Playing Cultural Catch-Up at Cookshop

The amazing Schu (and Steven too!) was good enough to treat me  to some NYMag Critic's Pick, Cookshop, last night. This little spot on 20th and 10th is truly delicious. Everything was delicious. Everything. Even the martini our waitress spilled all over Schumann and the table and my arm (which is how I tasted.)

My cocktail was also delicious. A rhubarb margarita. Apparently, says Schu, (and you know, he's always up on these things) rhubarb is the new "it" ingredient. (Or the First Food of Spring.) So I was happy to join the ranks of with-it New Yorkers again-- even if only for the short time it took to consume one cocktail. 

I had probably the least expensive thing on the menu: a ramps pizza (ramps, apparently being the other fashionable food item due to their short freshness window, says Schu. How does he learn this information?) that definitely took the prize for best bang for your buck. For just a couple of ingredients, it was the perfect size and totally inhaleable. Personally, I was a fan of Schu's Porkchop. But at the end of the evening, we agreed that the winner of the entrees was Steven's scallops. Despite the relatively small portion size, these babies just lemted in your mouth and were flavored in the same subtle, melts-away fashion. Delish. 

Add to the food, some of the sharpest pop-cultural minds in the business today, and it made for a first rate evening. Basically, no one delivers cultural commentary like Schu. And turns out, the combination of that one and Steven Jamail might just be lethal. Watch out, New York City.

Celebrating at the Cosmopolitan

From the first time I visited semi-recent addition to the Strip, Cosmopolitan, it became a favorite. That made it easy when I was planning my big birthday night out. I knew Cosmo had pretty much everything I wanted and all in a pretty convenient package. 


We started at Comme Ça, the David Myers French Brasserie upstairs for a girls dinner. It was good to have an intimate dinner like that. Let's just say Em and McC are a pretty vivacious combo. We feasted on delicious artichoke salads and flatbreads and then McC and I decided to get crazy. Comme Ça offers a Beef Wellington for two, served with a kind of black-eyed peas and kale succotash and peppercorn sauce. I conquered that Beef Wellington. McC was defeated by its girth. It's hard to blame her though. It was some serious Beef Wellington. 

Next, we moved on to the dessert course. I picked the Beignet au Chocolat, satisfying McC's love of bananas foster and Emily's love of chocolate. Our waiter, Nick, had them write me a birthday message in chocolate and since he had been so kind as to recommend some delicious espresso cocktails to go with dessert, I took his additional recommendation that I lick the plate. (Apparently, he'd been trying to get someone to do that for ages and I was the only one to oblige.) 

The meal was such a success, we thought, why end it there? So McC may or may not have slipped Nick her phone number and he may or may not have joined the party downstairs in the Chandelier Bar.


Corraling large groups makes me anxious, so I was happy once I found everyone and felt like I could relax with my London Summer cocktail. It was great to see everyone-- old high school and Buddhist friends, my old buddies from the newspaper-- some people I hadn't seen in years. People who taught me how to drive, people I won a State Championship with, people who taught me how write something like this blog right here.


And the ambience at Chandelier (excepting the truly tragic girl one level above us who kept leaning over the bar in the shortest dress ever to reveal to us she was not wearing any panties) is divine. If you want good photos from an evening, go there. 

Finally, as we all started to turn into pumpkins, we went to see our friend go-go dance at Bond. There, almost got in a fight with a tranny and danced to an oddly nineties mix of music, recalling our days of teenage glory when we'd drive around like good-hearted brats in Gia's BMW. Those were the days. And so are these. 

Saturday Celebration Music - New Regina Spektor

Dear Regina is finally back with a new album this May and the first tracks are hot. I'm jamming to "All the Rowboats" & "Don't Leave Me" today (along with various ridiculous Americana from John Cougar Mellancamp, Stevie Ray Vaughn, Garth Brooks and eff it, some Zac Brown Band just for shitz and giggles-- am I RIGHT McC!?!?!) while we chillax by the Wynn pool and do our girly thing. A+ on this carefree little french number. Ooh la la. That's our pool party song. 


I don't spend a lot of time in my life feeling cool. But some songs actually have the ability to make you feel cool enough to do things like dress up and go out hard core in your own ridiculous, camp hometown. To hit up pseudo French restaurants and lounge in a big chandelier. To walk through the casino in slow mo with your girls, fake wind machine in front of you, blowing your hair... right before you trip because you don't normally wear heels... but before that, you feel like a badass, because it's your birthday... and this is one of those songs. 


Well done, Reg. I shall buy this "What We Saw From The Cheap Seats" album when it comes out May 29. And thanks for the jams today. 

A Very Good Birthday Present from Lincoln Center

One nice present for turning 30 is that we're having a big concert at Lincoln Center, featuring songs from three of Steven and my musicals! It's extra exciting because at least 5 of these songs are brand new-- as in, no one's heard them before-- and a few have never been heard in NYC. 


Add to the amazing venue (Lincoln Center!?) a first rate cast of the best in the biz and our very good friends, and this is shaping up to be the place to be next Monday. Here's just some of the folks set to sing: Katie Rose Clarke, Janet Dacal,Chelsea Morgan Stock, Autumn Hurlbert, Rachelle Rak, Haviland Stillwell, Kyle Dean Massey, Marie-France Arcilla, Anthea Neri, Katie Thompson, Jason Michael Snow, Tim Dolan, Sam Tedaldi and Nikki Kimbrough with Jaygee Macapugy, Britt Bonney, Andy Geary, Anne Karner, Lauren Blackman, Ashley Klinger, Bobby Hubner, Beverley Simpson, Daniel Robinson, Christine Schisano, Eric Deibolt and Adam Shorsten.


It's even free! But there's only 200 seats, so get there early to make sure you get one. 

I'm not shy in saying that Steven is a very lucky dude. Not just because he gets to work with yours truly. If I had to pick collaborators, I'd also pick Kirsten Guenther, Sara Patterson, Morgan Karr, Krystin Crain Johnson and Mayzie Drake. 


Put this in you calendars right now!
Broadway's Future
April 16th
6PM
The New York Library for the Performing Arts
at Lincoln Center
111 Amsterdam Ave & 65th Street


Hope to see you there!

Problem of Miracles - The Grave of David Hume

Edinburgh's been a bit bleak lately, so it was a pleasant surprise to be awakened early yesterday morning with a phone call from Sophie. Surprise visitors are the best and we spent the afternoon catching up and tooling around Edinburgh's museums, speaker stores, and since it's so bleak (duh) cemeteries. I've always had a bit of a thing for old cemeteries, and you can't do much better than the old Calton Hill Cemetery. I mean, David Hume is there. Fave philosopher. 'Nuff said. Also it was gorgeous. Check out that fading sun behind (yes!) good old Abe Lincoln. 


Finally, I literally can't stop listening to this song. I love that one of the comments when I went to post this is as follows: "I'm so drunk I randomly typed Gotye on youtube and came to this song and it's completely changed my life." Happy Saturday. 

Houston Bound

Back to Houston for the first time in over five years. Other than friends and, ya know, seeing VOTE! all I can really think about Houston is food. I just want to eat at all my old favorite restaurants. I think it's going to be a big weekend for Mexican and Thai Food and Barbecue. Oh my god, I gotta stop thinking about Ninfa's and Nit Noi and Kolaches and Demeris and oh wow, I gotta go to sleep. While I fly, enjoy this vid of the baby birdies on ABC in Houston! 


UK'ers, hope they don't block this! Also, UK'ers, anyone wanna tell me if the new VOTE! cast album is actually available for purchase on UK itunes?


Also, talked to the one and only real live Ms Fowler via email today. An inspiration as always. Thanking Green Valley High School and Rice this week for my education.  

never let me go

This week, I rented Never Let Me Go on itunes rentals (genius. Love it. Thank you, itunes.) I love the book (mono no aware is like....my JAM.) and had been very excited about the adaptation since I heard about it. 


I wasn't disappointed. As far as book to film adaptations go, I thought it was about as successful as it was gonna get on this. Andrew Garfield, especially, as Tommy, was just.... ugh. My heart hurts. Oh and those children actors. Love 'em. 


Fun fact: filmed in part right here in St Andrews at Andrew Melville Hall. Super cool. Happy Saturday!

Guest Post: McC offers a piece of twix, & trip to Scotland

Greetings Fergie & Fifers!

McC here, back in Los Angeles after a lovely trip through the UK.

Playing dress-up in Ryann's clothes, St. Andrews :)

Tigerlily, Edinburgh

Ryann's future house

In the off chance that this blog has not persuaded you already, I am here to attest that Miss Ferguson lives in a truly special place. We laughed, we cried, we sang in the streets and offered to split candy bars with strangers. We drank Irn Bru...we watched Downton Abbey, played in the snow, and took a costume-drama tour of Edinburgh, too! It was paradise in a teacup, and I hope to return very, very soon.

Until I can get back on a boat to St. Andrews, I've put together a little collection of

Scottish-inspired treasures from Etsy for your perusal. Hope you enjoy! xo

1) Loch Ness, by Marco Suarez, 2) St. Andrews Flag Cushion Cover

3) Ceramic Thistle Travel Mug, 4) Mary Queen of Scots screenprint

5) Edinburgh, by Emily Hogarth, 6) Scotch In Your Tea

friendship is the christmas spirit

 Happy Christmas Eve! This has already been an eventful trip to round out an eventful year. The best times in my whole life, I think-- certainly the times that actually feel like the point of Christmas-- are these times with my friend-families. Sometimes, you just have to go help with an Elf photo shoot or be a witness on divorce papers. 


The mystic I saw this week said 2010 was a year for breaking apart. And indeed, I saw three friends through divorces. And I myself divorced from my spouse, New York. But I also saw that moving to another country made most of my best friendships stronger than ever. That I made so many new ones I now feel I could never live without. And there are these two new people-- Tigerlily & Luke. 


We can laugh (and yell if we need to) our way through anything. When deciding what to put on the Elf Christmas card, the original thought was something straight. But then Emily yells out, "Go Elf Yourself!" Would it be appropriate? Maybe not for any other family, but definitely for this one. Jimmy daddy put the issue to bed: "Do it. It's been that kind of year."